A woman meets a man, falls in love with him, and he reciprocates? Great. In all fairy tales, wedding bells sound afterward and a carriage pulled by snow-white horses takes the lovers away for “happily ever after”.
Except that all this happens exclusively in a fairy tale. And life is not a fairy tale… Unfortunately.
Whether a man can love two women is that everybody wants to find out. Let’s try to get to the bottom of this seemingly simple question.
A situation where both women showed up at the same time and knocked a man unconscious is unlikely. And even if that has happened, there is no point in talking about love. It’s just passion, attraction or desire. Call it what you like, but not love.
You can talk about love when one of them has been living with a man for a long time – they may even be married, but then the other one comes along.
Why does another woman appear?
Do you remember the phrase about the love boat and everyday life? Yes, yes, everyday life is the real destroyer of love. When people first start dating, everything seems perfect. And then they find themselves in a world where you can’t throw your socks around, you have to cook, and most importantly, you have to obey other people’s rules.
Family life is a series of compromises. And most accept these rules of the game. But after a few months, or maybe even years, a man realizes that his wife is a book he has read. He thinks he knows her thoroughly. She no longer needs to be conquered. She is boring and uninteresting.
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And then another woman appears. The world is transformed into a celebration where there is no place for everyday life. A man grows wings that he thought had long been clipped by his wife. And he truly believes that he loves his new girlfriend.
But what about the wife? The boring and uninteresting one? Should he leave her?
Men are polygamous
This argument is always made when it comes to male infidelity. The more women who are intimate with a man, the more heirs he will have. All in all, that’s right. Only now there is no need to increase the population. And women have learned how to use contraception quite well.
The second argument is the high level of testosterone, which is responsible for sexual desire. It is what drives men to conquer new women.
But one would like to believe that today’s man’s life is governed not only by hormones, but also by common sense.
What if it is love?
Very often a man is just comfortable convincing himself of his love for both. More often than not, he chooses different ladies, both in character and in temperament. He may have a feverish passion for one, but the other cooks perfectly. And there is no way for a man to know which is more important. He convinces himself that he loves both of them.
In a stressful situation, the brain shuts down all unnecessary things. But it is better to sort things out for yourself.
Is it really love?
Sooner or later, a man asks himself this question, seeking to make sense of the situation. Especially if each of the women is claiming him, trying to get sole possession of it. The mistress demands a divorce, and the wife demands a return to the family fold. And you have to make a choice.
It is possible to feel affection, attraction, desire and passion for many women. But knowing that a person cannot be betrayed or hurt is a different feeling.
Often men, given the impulse, would break off an existing relationship and throw themselves into a new one. And in most cases the epiphany comes very quickly.
When everyone is unhappy in love except the man
Imagine the following situation. A woman who has taken on the main burden of creating and maintaining a family looks like a domestic tyrant to her husband, wringing his hands and restricting his freedom. While the other woman takes on the role of a savior. It is up to her to free Prince Charming from the shackles of the evil sorceress. She thinks that taking a man away from his wife will make her soar and make her happy. And the man readily joins the game.
There is no need to talk about love in this situation. This man is just an infantile child who has allowed himself to be suppressed by one woman and now hopes to be rescued by another. That said, he has no intention of parting with his tyrant. He is quite happy with what is happening here and there. Moreover, having two women vying for his attention flatters his ego. Self-esteem skyrockets, especially if both women make an effort to win this battle.
A woman should stay away from such a relationship because this man loves neither of them. The only object of his love is himself.
Is there a perfect man who needs only one woman?
Of course there are. And they are usually happily married. They prefer a bird in the hand or just love their spouse, no matter what.
A marriage either grows stronger over the years or crumbles to dust, leaving the couple to work out whether they are ready to keep those pieces. There can be no counselor here. Everyone has to make his own decision and live with it. But if your man has made a mistake, don’t make the decision in the heat of the moment. Life is a long thing.